Before I was a Mom…

Author – Suzana Haertzen

Before I was a Mom…

I made and ate hot meals.
I had unstained clothing.
I had quiet conversations on the phone.

mom

Before I was a Mom…
I slept as late as I wanted
And never worried about how late I got into bed.
I brushed my hair and my teeth every day.

Before I was a Mom…
I cleaned my house each day.
I never tripped over toys or forgot words to lullabies.

Before I was a Mom…
I didn’t worry whether or not my plants were poisonous.
I never thought about immunizations.

Before I was a Mom…
I had never been puked on
Pooped on
Spit on
Chewed on
Pee’d on
Or pinched by tiny fingers

Before I was a Mom…
I had complete control of my thoughts
My body
My mind.
I slept all night.

Mom

Before I was a Mom…
I never held down a screaming child
So that doctors could do tests or give shots.
I never looked into teary eyes and cried.
I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin.
I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep.

Before I was a Mom…
I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn’t want to put him
down.
I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn’t
stop the hurt.
I never knew that something so small could affect my life so much.
I never knew that I could love someone so much.
I never knew I would love being a Mom.

Mom

Before I was a Mom…
I didn’t know the feeling of having my heart outside my body.
I didn’t know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby.
I didn’t know that bond between a Mother and her child.
I didn’t know that something so small could make me feel so
important.

Before I was a Mom…
I had never gotten up in the middle of the night every 10 minutes
to make sure all was okay
I had never known the warmth
The joy
The love
The heartache
The wonderfulment
Or the satisfaction of being a Mom.

I didn’t know I was capable of feeling so much…
…. before I was a Mom.

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