I thought that the stares and weird looks would pass once I turned an “appropriate” age for motherhood but unfortunately, it is still there and it is even worse now that I am expecting my third child at the age of 26!
I became a first-time mom at the age of 21, not because I accidentally fell pregnant, but because I wanted to. I got married at 20, and my husband and I have a 10-year-age gap.
There were times when I wondered how life would have been if I did not have my first child at the age of 21 – but I don’t regret anything.
I always knew that I wanted to be a mom and have a big family.
I wanted to be a young wife and a young mom. I wanted my children to grow up with me! What I did not realize is how quickly other people would judge me for doing so.
I am growing up a little alongside my children. But why is that such a tragedy?
Firstly, I don’t understand why some women think that it is okay to voice their negative opinion about someone else’s life (can’t we all just mind our own business?) and secondly the ones that are judging me are older women who are also moms!
It is so disappointing and quite sad.
What happened to supporting each other and standing strong as a tribe?
We are living in such a negative world, a world where people think that it is okay to bully and hate one another online and offline. The sad part of it is that this is a big problem in the mom community. We are so quick to judge each other – without even trying to understand what it must be like to be in that mom’s shoes.
We forget about feelings… and the way that negative words can impact someone.
Age shouldn’t determine if you are a good mother.
Why are we always trying to “label” ourselves in motherhood?
The young mom, the old mom, the single mom, the divorced mom etc.
Remember, we all share a common goal – to be the best we can for our kids. We all have tiny humans at home to take care of – little people who don’t care about how old we are.
All that they care about is that MOM is there.
This pregnancy, I’ve become so emotional about this topic because I feel like a victim every time I step out of the house. All eyes on me. The “young mom” with 2 kids who is about to pop out the third!
Honestly, the comments get to me… The stares make me feel uncomfortable.
Sometimes I don’t even want to go out in public with my kids.
Why should I need to explain my story to strangers who I will most probably never see again?
I know, I shouldn’t let them affect me but I am human and there’s only a certain limit that I can take.
When people see me at the mall with my 4-year-old daughter and 20-month-old son while pregnant with my third, I get the odd looks and some even come up to me to wish me “Good luck”.
Many of them also assume that I am a single mom because I don’t wear a wedding ring on my finger.
I’ve had odd questions like… “When did you become a single mom?” or “How are you going to manage alone with 3 kids?!”
At first, I didn’t take it seriously and laughed it off but after a while, it got under my skin.
These women were serious and so curious about my life that they thought it was okay to strike up a conversation with me and ask me how old I am.
I’m a friendly person so I will not ignore someone when they talk to me but now… I feel like a smile is all that I am going to give you dear stranger.
Remember…
I am a young woman who decided to have kids – but that doesn’t mean I give you the right to judge me for it.
Young moms are doing the same as older moms. They are mothering, working, loving, and giving off the best that they can every day.
Let’s be real and celebrate each other.
I am a mom just like you.
I have made a commitment to my marriage, to my kids, and to my unborn baby while pursuing my dreams and ambitions.
I am a woman just like you, a woman gave birth to children – birthed a new life, a new identity, that changed the way I think and the way I feel.
I’m a mother just like you, a mom who loves her children with the same passion that I would have had 5 years from now. The same passion, the same worry, the same love as any other mom!
